This one's a real kicker!

Boy, this most-recent collage is troubling me! One night I nearly cut it in pieces. Somehow i'm trying to keep the faith that it will all turn out fine.

I guess that's part of the creative process—not knowing, but having faith anyway. Sounds religious, which I'm not. It's certainly a kind of trust, trust that I'll be able to make it work out somehow. Maybe all these paintings aren't meant to get whipped out in five days. Maybe some are meant to stew a bit. It's hard to not know.

I have a hard time because I'm torn between painting and making some hats. The painting has been very fulfilling, and when I look at all the collages I see a depth of my expression that just can't come from making a hat. But there will be two more events this year, at which people will expect to be trying on hats. Balance. I was never very good with my balance—I'm all lop-sided. Hopefully I'll figure it out.